When a parent or grandparent passes and the family lives abroad, flying back for pind daan or shraddha is not always possible on short notice, especially when the rites fall within a fixed window after death or during Pitru Paksha. Here is a factual look at what NRI families commonly arrange in that situation.
A representative performs the rites in India
The most common approach is arranging for a family priest, or a professional pandit at a tirtha such as Gaya, Haridwar, or Varanasi, to perform the physical rites while a relative in India is present on the family’s behalf. The offerings, pinda, and related steps happen there, in person, even though the immediate family cannot travel.
Joining the sankalpa from abroad
The sankalpa, the spoken resolve that names the person performing the rite and its intention, can often be done by the family member abroad over a phone or video call, guided by the priest at the moment the rites begin in India. This lets the person taking on the responsibility participate directly rather than being represented only by proxy.
A simplified version at home
Some families choose instead to perform a scaled-down shraddha at home abroad: reciting the appropriate mantras, offering food to a priest or Brahmin locally, or making a donation in the ancestor’s name on the relevant tithi. A local temple in a large diaspora city can sometimes accommodate a small shraddha service if the family asks in advance. Families that combine both, a home observance plus arranging rites in India through a relative or priest, are also common, and neither path is treated as more or less complete than the other by most priests families consult.
Finding and paying a priest from abroad
Families typically find a pandit at Gaya, Haridwar, or Varanasi through a relative’s existing contact, a recommendation from their home temple, or increasingly through priest-booking services that have sprung up to serve NRI families specifically. Costs vary widely by the scope of the rites and the priest’s standing, but a basic pind daan package at Gaya commonly runs somewhere in the range of a few thousand to ten thousand rupees, with more elaborate multi-day rites costing more. Paying in advance by UPI or wire transfer before the date is standard practice now, and most established priests will confirm a booking in writing over WhatsApp.
Getting proof the rites happened
Reputable priests now routinely send photos or a short video of the rites being performed, timestamped, so the family abroad has some confirmation beyond a verbal report. It’s reasonable to ask for this upfront when booking rather than after the fact, and most priests who work regularly with NRI families are used to the request.
Different rites, different timing
The rites performed in the days immediately following a death, often on a 13-day cycle, are distinct from the annual shraddha performed during Pitru Paksha each year for an ancestor generally. A family unable to travel for the immediate post-death rites may still plan to attend in person for a future Pitru Paksha shraddha, or continue arranging both remotely going forward; neither choice is treated as lesser by most priests consulted on this.
What this site can help with
Nakshara does not arrange priests or book pind daan or shraddha services. What it can help with is tracking the correct tithi and dates for Pitru Paksha and related observances on the festivals page, so families abroad know when these windows fall each year.